


Minding Tempers

by theatrchy2004 (Terminal_Trekkie)



Series: Minding Matters [5]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst, Armitage Hux Has Issues, Armitage Hux Needs A Hug, Developing Relationship, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Implied Sexual Content, Language, M/M, Poe Dameron Is A Mess, Poe Dameron Needs A Hug, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-17
Updated: 2020-08-17
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:07:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,831
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25944829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Terminal_Trekkie/pseuds/theatrchy2004
Summary: Will the boys survive their first argument? Or is this the end of their budding relationship?
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Armitage Hux
Series: Minding Matters [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1738927
Comments: 3
Kudos: 38





	Minding Tempers

**Author's Note:**

> This fic takes place after Chapter 1 of Minding Lovers Past.
> 
> Trigger Warnings: Brief mention of suicidal thoughts. 
> 
> Also lots of angst and miscommunication.

_ Working late. Won’t be home for dinner. _

That was all the text said. No apology or softening the blow. Poe sighed. That was three nights in a row now, and he’d lost count of how many times total in the last few weeks. He knew Hux took his job seriously, but this was getting to be a bit much. 

Dinner was almost ready, of course. Not wanting to eat alone again, Poe picked up his phone.

“You like spaghetti, right?” he asked the person on the other end of the line when they picked up. 

“Um,  _ yeah _ ,” Rey responded as though liking spaghetti were the most obvious thing in the world, “but then you know me, I’ll eat just about anything.”

Poe chuckled, “Well if you get your ass over here in the next twenty minutes you can have all the spaghetti you want.”

“Don’t have to tell me twice. Be right there!” Rey clicked off the call and sure enough arrived lickety split. 

They were about halfway through the meal and a glass of wine in when Rey asked, “Okay, what gives?”

“What do you mean?”

“I know you, Poe.” She pointed a spaghetti-wrapped fork at him, “Don’t think I haven’t noticed your somber mood. You might be able to fool others with that charming smile, but not me. Spill.”

Poe sighed. He’d honestly just wanted company to take his minds off his troubles, but maybe that’s why he’d subconsciously called Rey. She knew him too well and wouldn’t let him get away with his usual deflection tactics. She’d force his hand just as she was doing now. 

“It’s nothing, it’s just… Armitage has been really busy with work is all. I barely see him and when I do his mind is still on work! Or he’s so stressed out from the work it’s just straight to wham, bam, thank you ma’am.” Poe slumped back in his chair. “Meanwhile, here I am, feeding his cat for him and cooking dinners he doesn’t show up for.”

“Waitaminute,” Rey interrupted. “Does this? Am I your pity date? Is this pity spaghetti? You’re feeding me pity spaghetti!”

“Are you saying you don’t want it?” he quirked an eyebrow.

“No, I’m going to eat the shit out of this pity spaghetti, but that doesn’t make it any less insulting.” She aggressively ripped a piece of garlic bread apart, shoving it into her mouth. 

“If it makes you feel better, technically I’m your pity date,” Poe appeased her as she chewed.

Rey shook her head, “Pity doesn’t look good on anyone. Look, have you tried talking to him?”

“When? He’s always at work, even on the weekends. When he’s not, well, we’re busy with other things.”

“Sexy things?” Rey questioned. At his nod she pursed her lips, pondering the situation. “You think he’s using you, don’t you?” When Poe shifted uncomfortably he confirmed her suspicions. “Poe, I really don’t think he’s doing this on purpose. Knowing him, he’s probably just clueless.”

“How do you figure that?”

“Well, think about it,” Rey continued thoughtfully, wiping sauce off her lip, “we know his relationship with Ben was pretty much abusive. Everytime any of us are kind to him he literally doesn’t know how to handle it. Chances are yours is the first healthy relationship he’s had, like, ever, so it makes sense he’s still learning the ropes.”

Poe frowned. “But that’s just it. I don’t want to upset him.”

Rey rolled her eyes. “So instead you’re going to sit here and sulk? All that’s going to do is make you resent him. Just talk to him.”

Poe thought over her words even after she left. He did not relish the thought of confronting Armitage on this matter. He gave off the impression of being a very open person, unafraid of talking about feelings, and he was… so long as it was other people’s feelings. Talking about his own feelings though? Forget about it. He hated upsetting people. It was easier to ignore his own needs and desires than face the prospect of making someone he cared about unhappy. He was especially sensitive to making Armitage unhappy, knowing what he knew of the other man’s past. Call him selfish, but he wanted Armitage to only associate him with good things. The logical part of him knew that was completely unreasonable, especially if he wanted this to be a long-term relationship. He knew Rey was right, but that didn’t mean he had the courage to do the right thing. So instead he packed up some of the leftovers from dinner and left them in the fridge across the hall for his boyfriend. What else was he supposed to do?

* * *

This was officially the month from hell. One of the downsides to being overly competent at one’s job was that one often found themselves saddled with the most difficult cases; and Armitage Hux was nothing if not overly competent. As such, the last three weeks, or was it four now, Armitage had been living, eating and breathing the case from hell. 

Thank God he had Poe. Sweet, patient, affectionate, Poe. He still wondered at what he’d done to ever deserve having this wonderful man in his corner, but he was so grateful he did. He didn’t know how he’d have survived the last few weeks without him by his side. 

Tonight was the first night in several days that Armitage had made it home at a decent hour. After a quick stop in his apartment to feed Millicent, he hurried across the hall, knocking on the door. A muffled “Come in” beckoned him to enter. 

Sure enough, Poe was in the kitchen preparing dinner. Armitage had no idea what it was, just that it smelled delicious. He took off his jacket and rolled up his sleeves, watching Poe at work. He allowed himself a moment to scan the other man’s body, his eyes stopping to linger on his delectable ass. Smirking, he sidled up behind the other man, hands stroking over his shoulders and sides before gently grasping his hips, pressing kisses to his neck.

Poe’s body went rigid at the touch. “Armitage, I’m cooking.”

“That never stopped you before,” Armitage nipped playfully at his ear.

Feeling a surge of irritation, Poe shrugged him off, “Come on, Hux, stop it.”

That gave the ginger pause. Poe never called him Hux anymore, not when they were alone anyway. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong, I’m just not in the mood,” despite his words, the tension rolling off his body reached across the room to his boyfriend. “Dinner will be ready soon.”

“I’m not hungry,” Armitage clipped, sounding very much like an impetuous child. 

Poe pinched the bridge of his nose. “Fine. If you don’t want to eat with me you can go home. I’m sure Millicent misses you.”

“What I  _ want  _ is for you to tell me what’s got your knickers in a twist.”

“I turn down sex one time and suddenly my knickers are in a twist? That’s rich, especially from you.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

And just like that Poe tamped down as quickly as he’d snapped. “It’s nothing. Forget it.”

A cold nauseous feeling settled in Armitage’s gut as a thick silence fell over them. “You think I’m like him. Don’t you?”

“Like who?” Poe asked, fatigue in his voice.

“Ben. You think I’m a monster just like him.”

“What?! No,” Poe abandoned the paella on the stove, turning to face his boyfriend. “You’re nothing like him.”

“It makes sense really,” Armitage continued, his demeanour turning cold and analytical, more like he’d been when they first met. “We were together long enough, it’d be logical to assume I’d pick up his bad habits.”

“That’s not what I meant. I just meant… I haven’t seen you in days! I’m lucky if I even get a text from you letting me know you’re going to be late, or not home at all. When I do see you it’s like this. Not even a hello, just straight to the bedroom. As much as I love fucking you into the mattress, I need more than that.”

“Did it ever occur to you that I’m under a lot of pressure at work right now? That maybe I want to talk to you about it but client-attorney privilege prevents me from doing so?”

“Of course it’s occurred to me! That’s why I haven’t said anything, but I don’t think I can take much more of this.”

“How long have you felt this way, Poe?” Armitage asked, his voice dangerously quiet.

“Look, it doesn’t matter -”

“How long?!”

“Days, maybe weeks,” Poe muttered, his gaze shifting to the floor.

Armitage inhaled sharply through his nose, rubbing his chin as he took this bit of news in. “I see. Well. I’m sorry to have inconvenienced you so,” he sneered. “Here I was, thinking how lucky I was to be with a man who finally understood me, whom I could trust to be as open with me as I’ve been with him. Only to learn he’s been lying to me for weeks, letting me use him and abuse him, unwittingly turning into the monster I’ve always known I am.”

“Tage, no, you’re not a monster,” Poe’s voice softened as he took a step towards the other man.

“No!” Armitage took a step back, holding his hand up. “Clearly I am. Why else would it take so long for you to say something?”

“It’s not that simple. I didn’t want to upset you.”

“Because I’m the bloody picture of peace and tranquility right now?!” 

Poe winced. “Look, I’m sorry I said anything. Come on, let’s eat dinner.”

“No,” Armitage grabbed his jacket off the chair he’d draped it over and headed toward the door.

“Tage, come on,” Poe pleaded, following after him.

“No! I will not dine with someone who thinks so poorly of me.” He turned red-rimmed eyes on the man he’d come to care for more than he ever thought possible. “Ever since day one you’ve wanted me to be open with you, and I have, even when it made me uncomfortable. But you obviously can’t be open with me, not even to tell me when I’m hurting you. I thought I could trust you.”

Before Poe could respond, Armitage stormed across the hall, slamming and locking his door behind him. 

* * *

Three days. It had been three long days since Armitage stormed out of his apartment, and perhaps his life. 

That night he’d tried to get Armitage to come out and talk to him, knocking and pleading at his door. Eventually he gave up, leaving a carefully packed container of paella at his door as a peace offering before crawling into bed and crying himself to sleep. When he opened his door the next morning he found that same container, unopened, at his own door, bringing about a new surge of tears. 

Poe’s texts went unanswered, and try as he might to catch the ginger in the hallway, Armitage was as stealthy as his feline counterpart, managing escape every time. Just then his phone started ringing. Poe felt a surge of hope until he checked the caller ID.

“Hey Rey,” he didn’t even try to hide his disappointment when he answered.

“Well hello to you too. What crawled up your arse and died?” 

He sighed, “It’s nothing, Rey. What do you want?”

Slightly off put by Poe’s unusually brusque demeanor, Rey scoffed. “Nothing, my arse. What’s up? Hux still giving you the wham, bam, thank you ma’am?”

After a moment of no response she was about to ask again when she heard a sob on the other end of the line. “Poe?” 

“I fucked up, Rey,” yep, Poe was definitely sobbing. “I should have listened to you, I should have said something sooner. Instead we had this big fight, and now he won’t speak to me. I think… I think it might be over.”

Rey felt helpless, not being able to offer much comfort over the phone. “Oh...Poe. I’m so sorry. Are you sure? Maybe he just needs time to cool off.”

Poe sniffled, “I don’t know. I...I think I really hurt him. Said he thought he could trust me. Do you know how hard it is for him to trust people? The last thing I ever wanted was for him to feel like he can’t trust me.”

“Poe, listen to me. Chances are you probably did hurt him; but he hurt you too, remember? This is not all your fault. Relationships are a two-way street. Sure, you should have said something about him blowing you off for work, but that doesn’t negate the fact that he did it in the first place. He hurt you first. He’s not blameless in this.”

“I don’t care. I shouldn’t’ve said anything,” he muttered.

“Poe Dameron, I swear to God if you say you shouldn’t have shared your feelings with him one more time I’m going to come over there and slap you silly!” That made him chuckle at least. “Just… give it a bit more time, I’m sure he’ll come around.”

* * *

Oh he was going to come around, alright, if it was the last thing Rey did. She liked Hux, really she did, but if he thought she was going to sit idly by while he broke one of her best friends’ hearts, he had another thing coming. 

She wasn’t surprised that he didn’t answer her calls or texts, but that didn’t mean it didn’t piss her off any less. Needless to say the voicemails she left him got longer and more creative in how she was going to hand his ass to him. 

Finally having enough of being ignored, Rey did the only thing she could think of. She spent her afternoon off waiting for him outside his office. She caught the flash of red hair the moment he exited the building. He was tense, more tense than she’d ever seen him, even in the early days of their friendship when he was all stiff and awkward around them. When he saw her his frown deepened.

“What do you want?” he growled as he approached.

“You know bloody well what I want. Or were my voicemails not colorful enough for you?”

“I deleted them unheard. One would assume losing Poe means losing you all too.”

Rey narrowed her eyes. She wasn’t sure, but she thought she caught a hint of sadness under all the anger roiling off his shoulders. “And what makes you so sure you’ve lost Poe?”

“He’s made his opinion of me very clear,” his answer was clipped. “Now get off my car so I can go home.” He tossed his briefcase in the backseat. 

Rey kept her butt firmly planted to the hood of his car. “Nuh-uh, you don’t get to run away from this one.”

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Hux sucked in a breath and counted to ten. “Rey, please,” he gritted out. “I’m not running from anything. I’m just leaving him alone like he wants.”

“Are you kidding me? In what backwards arse universe does Poe want you to leave you alone? You do realise he’s head over heels for you, right?”

“Impossible,” his mask finally settled into place. “No one feels that way for a monster like me.”

“Monster? What are you on about?” Rey swore these boys were going to be the death of her. 

“That’s what he thinks of me, isn’t it? A monster, just like Ben. Just like my father.” His last sentence was almost a whisper. 

Rey’s eyebrows shot up. “Okay, there is a  _ lot  _ to unpack here. Look, Hux, I don’t know exactly what Poe did or said to make you think that, but trust me when I say he does not think you’re a monster. He’s just… really bad at talking about his feelings, so he bottles it all up inside until things come to a head and he can’t help but just… feel his feelings all over the place.”

Hux snorted. “That’s bollocks, he’s always talking to me about his feelings.”

“No, he’s always talking to you about your feelings, there’s a difference. Think about it,” she watched him as the wheels started to turn in his head, “He’s the one who coaxed you out of your shell, who got you to open up to him, who’s always there to comfort you when you need it. Look, Poe’s a giver, it’s in his nature to give. But sometimes he gives too much, and when he does that he needs someone who can be there for him in the way he’s there for all of us.”

“Oh god,” Hux sat on the hood next to her, his shoulders slumping. “I’m the worst, I’m literally the worst.”

Rey rolled her eyes. “You’re not the worst. God, you’re both such drama queens, I swear you deserve each other.”

“I thought he was withholding from me on purpose, to manipulate me or something. But that’s not it, is it? I did something to upset him, to make him pull back. But what?”

“You really don’t know?”

He shook his head, “I honestly don’t.” He seemed years younger like this, ginger locks falling into lost green eyes.

Rey sighed, “I figured as much. Look, I know whatever it is you do as a highfalutin, fancy pants lawyer can be demanding, but lately it’s gotten to the point where I think Poe started to feel like he wasn’t that important to you anymore.”

“That’s not true. He’s the most important person in the world to me. I was just… stressed out!” he raked a frustrated hand through his hair, “And oh god, I took it out on him.”

Rey nodded sympathetically, rubbing his back. “It happens to the best of us, Hux.”

“Why didn’t he say anything?”

“He could see you were stressed and he didn’t want to upset you further.”

“Well we can see how well that turned out.”

Rey snorted a laugh. “You can fix it, you know.”

“How? Everything’s gone balls up as far as I can tell. He’d be a fool to take me back now.”

“Well, he might be my best friend, but that doesn’t change the fact that Poe Dameron is about as foolish as they come, especially when it comes to matters of the heart.” She hopped off the hood of the car. “Come on, you’re driving me home.”

Hux numbly followed her lead, getting into the car. Before turning the ignition on he turned to her, “You really think he’ll forgive me?”

Rey shrugged, “Won’t know till you try. But yeah, Hux. I think he’ll forgive you.”

* * *

Armitage couldn’t believe how badly he’d fucked up. Poe Dameron coming into his life was the best thing that had ever happened to him, and being his usual selfish self he’d taken him for granted. 

Splashing water on his face he looked into the mirror. “Useless,” he muttered to himself, echoing his father’s words. “Can’t do anything right.” He opened his medicine cabinet and stared at the bottles of pills. Antidepressants, anti-anxiety meds, sleep aids. He picked up the bottle of sleep aids. It would be so simple. Enough of these and he’d slip away never to bother anyone again.

His hand shaking he put the bottle back in the cabinet. He couldn’t do it. Even if he’d lost Poe forever, he couldn’t do that to the other man. He knew he’d only blame himself, and Armitage had already caused him enough pain. 

Sighing, he resumed his task of gathering the random things Poe had left around his place. Millicent was quite indignant when he pulled one of Poe’s shirts out from under her. “I know, girl, but we have to give it back.” He choked back a sob, pressing the garment to his face. It still smelled like him; musky and spicy and just so quintessentially Poe. 

Finally, he gathered his courage to face Poe. There were only a few feet between their doors, but it felt like the widest berth in the world now. He set the box down before knocking timidly at the door. 

When it finally opened, Armitage felt something uncoil in his chest, seeing Poe’s face for the first time in days. Armitage bit his lip before saying, “Hey.” He immediately wanted to kick himself. Nearly a week of radio silence and he opens with hey?

“Hey,” Poe’s voice was soft, uncertain.

“I um,” Armitage stumbled over his words. “I just wanted to say I’m sorry. For the other day. I shouldn’t have said those things. And for before. I never meant to take you for granted.”

Poe seemed to relax a bit. “I’m sorry too. You were right. I should have said something sooner. I can’t expect you to read my mind.”

“My psychic abilities are pretty bollocks,” Armitage managed to smirk. He picked up the box foisting it toward Poe. “I brought you your things.”

What little smile was on Poe’s face dropped immediately. “I don’t want them.”

Ginger brows furrowed together. “Well I can’t keep them.”

“Are...you want to break up?”

“Of course not,” Armitage frowned. “I just thought, well, I didn’t think you’d want anything to do with me anymore.”

“Tage,” Poe took the box from him and set it back on the ground with a loud plop, “what could possibly make you think that?”

“I thought we’d established I’m not a mind reader.”

Poe took a step toward him, invading his personal space. “I don’t want this to be over.”

Armitage was growing more confused by the second. “I don’t either, but it seems whatever this is has run its logical course. I don’t see how you could possibly still want me.”

Poe sighed, snaking his arms around the slender waist before him. “Tage, just because I got angry doesn’t mean I don’t still want you. You got angry with me too. Does that mean you don’t want me anymore?”

“I could never stop wanting you,” Armitage spoke with conviction. It was the truth. He’d never stop wanting Poe, mind, body and soul. 

“Okay then,” Poe smiled and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips. Armitage returned it eagerly, bringing his hands up to Poe’s face. 

When they broke the kiss, Armitage kept his hands on Poe’s face, stroking his cheekbones gently with his thumbs. “Promise me you’ll stop hiding from me? I want to take care of you the same as you’ve done for me.”

Poe blushed. “I promise I’ll try.” Another kiss, “And you can’t just disappear into your work. It makes me feel invisible.”

“Never again,” Armitage kissed him fiercely. “You’re my whole world.”

“And you’re mine.” 

Forgetting the box in the hallway, the pair tumbled into Poe’s apartment, making up for lost time. They both knew this was far from their last argument, but at least they knew they could weather the storm together. Neither one was going to let the other get away again. 

**Author's Note:**

> So Rey ended up playing a bigger role in this than I'd anticipated, but thank Oz for that or these two knuckleheads might not have made their way back into each others' arms!


End file.
